Wnat idiot wrote these ten commandments?

The Onion asks a question that is on all our minds: what idiot wrote these ten commandments?

Take the first commandment, for example. It says you shouldn't believe in any gods besides God. No gods besides the one, eh? Okay, I can agree with that. Frankly, I got no idea how foreigners keep track of all their different gods. But as an opener? As number one on a list of 10? Seems pretty weak to me. You want to lead off with a batter who can hit.

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Altogether, I believe these commandments are pretty thin on law and order and the needs of the common citizen, and a little thick on the religious mumbo jumbo.