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Monday, July 02, 2007

Alabama Governor: Pray for Rain

Alabama governor Bob Riley asked for everyone in his state to pray for rain.

No I shit you not:

With the state's weather forecasters not delivering much-needed rain, Gov. Bob Riley on Thursday turned to a higher power. The governor issued a proclamation calling for a week of prayer for rain, beginning Saturday.

Riley encouraged Alabamians to pray "individually and in their houses of worship."

"Throughout our history, Alabamians have turned in prayer to God to humbly ask for his blessings and to hold us steady during times of difficulty," Riley said. "This drought is without question a time of great difficulty."


You mean to tell me that Alabama has collectively prayed to God during their times of difficulty? No wonder its the sphincter of the United States!

Its amazing that this is still happening in the year 2007. Maybe they should spend some time building a desalinization plant or pushing a water conservation awareness campaign. I'm quite sure that these would be much more effective ways to address the problem than with prayers.

Prayer retards effective action. Maybe that's why prayer involves clasping your hands in some way, rendering them incapable of doing any real work.

Post a Comment


11 Comments:

At 7/02/2007 4:42 AM, Blogger BlackSun declaimed...

A month ago, it was Georgia. It's spreading.

 
At 7/02/2007 11:02 AM, Blogger J declaimed...

I hate my state.

I really hate my state.

 
At 7/02/2007 12:31 PM, Blogger Zachary Moore declaimed...

He's got the right idea, but sloppy execution. Elijah got rain from Yahweh by first challenging about 1000 prophets of Baal or Asherah to a "fire from heaven" contest with bull sacrifices. Maybe Bob Riley could invite a bunch of Hindus or Muslims or whomever to a barbecue competition instead, on the condition that the respective pits have to be lit by divine intervention. Only problem is, if you follow the Biblical model, whichever side loses gets horribly slaughtered, but at least Yahweh will open up the heavenly floodgates...

 
At 7/02/2007 6:23 PM, Blogger Aaron Kinney declaimed...

Well, just to piss Alabama off, I am going to pray for DROUGHT! PLUS, I am going to throw in a few animal sacrifices into the mix so that they will give a "sweet smell unto the lord."

That'll fix their wagon!

Seriously though, if someone in Alabama publicly announced that they would pray the exact OPPOSITE of what the governor wants, then would he perhaps execute some kind of warrant or something to stop the drought prayers?

 
At 7/02/2007 9:27 PM, Blogger Frank Walton declaimed...

hey ass-heads, thought I'd stop by and see what you retards were doing.
It's funny that you guys have the boo-boos to keep this site alive after the raping you constantly suffer from informed and educated theists.

 
At 7/03/2007 4:16 AM, Blogger G-man declaimed...

Frank Walton, huh? Just go pray the site closes down, leaving comments is entirely unnecessary.

I enjoy reading this blog, for what it's worth, 'ass-heads' :)

 
At 7/03/2007 8:16 AM, Blogger Zachary Moore declaimed...

Frank-

Thanks for stopping by. Your comments are always appreciated and entertaining.

 
At 7/03/2007 10:45 AM, Blogger bama enviro declaimed...

Anyone of you live in Alabama? Except perhaps the person who hates their state? I live here and no it is not the sphincter of the country - Mississippi is. Ask any Alabamian. I am certain your readers will delight to know that the state legislature tried to pass a bill requiring a christian education month in all public schools. Religion in government here is infuriating, but until we have more progressive minded folks moving to Alabama, it will never change. So please consider relocating and helping our cause. Nice to find your blog.

 
At 7/03/2007 1:51 PM, Blogger Aaron Kinney declaimed...

ATTENTION:

The "frank walton" who jumped in here is an imposter. I confirmed this with the REAL Frank Walton.

I dont like the real FW, but I like imposters even less. This faker needs to just shut up and go away.

 
At 7/03/2007 1:54 PM, Blogger Aaron Kinney declaimed...

Bama Enviro,

Anyone of you live in Alabama?

No, thank God.

I live here and no it is not the sphincter of the country - Mississippi is. Ask any Alabamian.

LOL!!! And the White Hosue is full of compassionate conservatives, just ask Tony Snow!

I am certain your readers will delight to know that the state legislature tried to pass a bill requiring a christian education month in all public schools. Religion in government here is infuriating, but until we have more progressive minded folks moving to Alabama, it will never change. So please consider relocating and helping our cause. Nice to find your blog.

Thanks, and I do understand and sympathize with your appeal, but I wouldnt do something so self-sacrificial as to move to Alabama.

And all culture aside, the weather of Los Angeles is much nicer. Im just too damn happy livin it up in SoCal.

 
At 7/10/2007 10:13 PM, Blogger John declaimed...

Aaron, I always like what you have to say and appreciate the mini-dialogues we've had.

Having said that, I have to disagree about the prayer thing. While some might see it as some kind of push-button fix-all, Scripture teaches something rather different. It seems to me that prayer is mostly, if not completely, meant to position or situate the praying person to convey desires while expecting only the wisdom and disposition to receive negative feedback.

Personally, my method is to pray so that I am positioning myself to be obedient; however, often-times and certainly throughout Scripture, God uses man as a means to accomplish His goals. Therefore, I think prayer efficacious (but don't ask me how of course) insofar as it also motivates action on the part of the person praying.

I know it's nit-picky but hey.

When are you going to come to Texas and have a beer with me and Zach?

 

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